Saturday, May 30, 2009

God Tussi great ho!

Folks, Life can’t be that bad. Granted we got recession. Granted pink slips are on. But I am sure there must be something to thank the Lord for! I am no Columbus. Yeah I have more geographical sense. If I leave for India I don’t ever land up in Timbuktoo. So maybe I can set on this journey of realization and thanks giving more confidently than him at least.

1.As I come out of my house , I feel a drop of rain on my head and I look up. Damn! I get a bird’s dropping right in my eye. And I thank god. This is my first thanksgiving.
Thank you lord that the cows can’t fly!

2.I fill a job application for a scientific company. To show off my knowledge and humor I mention Newton’s theory of gravity and how it needed an apple to fall on his head to make it work. And I find another reason to thank god.
Thank you lord that water melons don’t grow on trees. Else there wouldn’t have been a Newton and no Law of gravity!
( For those of you who don’t know what’s the law of gravity, its that part of Physics which can be blamed when you slip and fall on your buttocks. You could say something like it wasn’t my stupidity but Gravity that did it. Else I would have flown.

3.The body is god’s most beautiful creation. And our posterior the most unsung hero.
Imagine but for it, I would have been sitting in a forest and writing on a banana leaf competing with Rishi ved vyasa.
Think about it folks, if scientists didn’t bust their ass, the industrialists didn’t work their butts off and the inventors didn’t haul their ass, where would we be?
Also the English language would be that much poorer. The Americans cant speak three sentences in a row without mentioning that word.
So thank you lord for giving us ungrateful mortals that greatest gift. We don’t realize our most precious asset and sit on it. Silly people.

4.Lord, if you gave Newton and Einstein to the west, you gave us great scientists like Rajnikant and Mithunda who challenged their discoveries. The least the nobel prize committee could do is give them a life time achievement award. And this could be shared with the half a billion people who believed them. Science is half logic and half faith. We have faith double and so don’t need any logic.
Thanks indeed mighty Lord.

5.Thank you lord for giving us Mayawati, red brigade, the left front and the right front. They instilled the fear of god in us.
Suddenly Singh is King and no one is complaining.
I may even vote for him as the sex symbol of 2009!
Move Rahul Gandhi, you got competition.

6.Finally Lord, thanks for your kindness in granting me appreciative readers of rare intellect and amazing sense of humor. Thanks for making them so clever.
( and so gullible to believe every word of praise that I say! )

10 comments:

  1. whole of this post is awesome,
    I feel confused in deciding which part
    I liked most .................

    keep writing uncle...

    tc

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  2. that was a good read ! thanks for the smiles :)

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  3. hey thanks pretty. appreciate it.

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  4. loe...love...love the post :)) Hillarious...you write really well Sudhir :)) The best part is "The body is god’s most beautiful creation. And our posterior the most unsung hero...We don’t realize our most precious asset and sit on it." hhahahah!!!

    will be following the blog and keep stopping by more :))

    best
    -nivi

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  5. I loved this post! It was so witty and hilarious. Keep em coming :)
    Oh & I am a follower now!

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  6. If I leave for India I don’t ever land up in Timbuktoo
    is that supposed to be funny
    NOT

    Thank you lord that the cows can’t fly!
    yes i will thank GOD if people like you stop writing

    its GOD not god

    otherwise pretty funny


    NOT

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  7. thanks Choco for your support as always.
    thanks Nivedita for your kind words. i am flattered.
    thanks Ayahtolla, i know sometimes i do crack lame jokes. :)

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  8. Thanks a ton! :)

    And hope it doesn't come through at the I-scratch-your-back-you-scratch-mine, scenario :P... But I think your post was hilarious! :D

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  9. Thanks Tee Hee. Much appreciated.

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